We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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