You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
How naked do you want me to be?
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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