god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
Randomize