On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
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