hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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