would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
