Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
