For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
Randomize
