It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize