ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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