Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Randomize
