Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i like how i just referred to his pregnant wife as the "other" melissa and you didn't even judge me.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
