Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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