my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
we're chasing vodka with high fives
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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