Where are you?
In a non slutty way
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
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