Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
