And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
True Life: I puke at bars and try to catch it in my hand...then walk away like it didn't happen
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Randomize
