Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
