Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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