please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
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