I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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