Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
