Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
