OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Woke up with his dick on the side of my face, it's like he passed out mid-mushroom stamp.
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
My dick has a subreddit
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
