ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Randomize
