K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize