I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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