that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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