How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
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