The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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