He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
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