it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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