And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Randomize
