I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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