part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
