if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Randomize