please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
