is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
