is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Oh man. I threw up in the first cab. Got kicked out. Roamed somewhere for awhile. Fell asleep in the back if the second cab. Woke up in my underwear on the living room floor with a frozen pizza (thawed) laying next to me
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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