At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
