I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
