i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
