HIV tests are more positive than that guy
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
