remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
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Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
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