we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
Randomize
