Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Randomize
