All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
