um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
