Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
