Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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